It’s the end of a day and the children are in bed. It’s been exhausting, what with fetching and carrying, feeding and watering, work, play and everything in between.
I need a treat.
A lovely glass of chilled wine to wind down.
But it doesn’t stop there does it.
It’s usually a couple of glasses of wine.
Sometimes it’s three quarters of a bottle.
Occasionally a whole bottle.
It is not a good state of affairs.
I didn’t used to drink this much and I certainly didn’t drink on my own
But things have been creeping up on me and I need to face the reality that I am drinking too much.
I have cut it down somewhat by having spritzers but whereas I used to have the occasional glass during the week I now seem to have a couple of glasses a night.
It has all become far too convenient.
Wine is relatively cheap.
It comes in a screw top bottle.
And now I read it is also available by the glass at M&S and in Tetrapaks which may be all well and good for the environment but won’t be any good for me.
I mean a Tetrapak is just like having it in a box, I won’t be able to frighten myself with how much I’ve drunk because I won’t be able to see how much I have drunk until the Tetrapak is empty. Not that I ever got through a whole box.
It doesn’t help having friends over either. J usually drops in of an evening before he goes home (he works in the barn) and whereas we used to have a cup of tea we now tend to have a glass or two.
I suppose I encourage it by offering and really I should not. But if truth be known it is a way of getting him to stay longer, putting off the moment for me when I will be on my own until the following day. Dear Charlie doesn’t come home during the week anymore and while I know this is for the best, it makes the evenings yawn ahead and I don’t really know what to do with myself.
Should I be worried or is it merely a blip while I get accustomed to the new way of life?