Wednesday, 12 September 2012

Bringing up Boys: ARRRGGGGHHHHHHH

Sometimes that is the only way to deal with the boys.
SHOUT
SCREAM
And Holler a bit.
It is quite exhausting but effective....eventually.
I have a loud voice, thank heavens, otherwise I would have been totally rolled over (metaphorically speaking) and completely out of control.
As it is I am only mildly out of control but those looking on may beg to differ.
If I had had a quiet and unassuming way about me then I fear things could have been a lot worse. I would be one of those mothers who ineffectually asks her son to stop being so rough with Little Johnny as he may not like being  put head first down in the toilet and to not pull the pretty picture off the wall in the Sainsbury wing of the National Portrait Gallery as other people may want to look at it too.
No, with my boys I have found there is only one way to get through to them...
Say NO to any request and shout when they fail to obey an order immediately; in fact shout the order first just so they know that what you are saying is important.
I would love to just be able to request they do something but I have found that they just ignore me especially when they think they have something better to do.
So I gird my loins in the morning to get them up, we start off pleasantly enough. Good mornings are said and curtains are drawn and I'll add a chirpy little comment about the day ahead.
But by the time I have tripped over the plethora of toys and dirty clothes strewn across the floor and trodden on the ubiquitous bit of Lego in my bare feet to reach the effing curtains I am in top notch scream mode - it gets them out of bed quick enough.
Getting them brushing teeth and going to the loo, washing their faces etc is like wading through treacle it takes so long. I goad and plead and threaten and hassle before stomping off downstairs threatening them with dire consequences if they don't get down here in five minutes.
About twenty minutes later they are just about ready to have breakfast and I am boiling like a kettle. Food is thrust at them and any pretence of requesting and asking nicely has been banished for the duration.
I do try, honest I do! I keep saying to myself I need to be nice adn calm and motherly, but whenever I am, I just feel I am being taken advantage of.
I love them to bits but there is only one way to deal with them - shout like Sergeant Major and order not ask.
It hasn't done them any harm as far as I can see. And as I type this out they are waiting for me in their bedrooms to say goodnight, they are trying very hard not to giggle but failing...dismally..
PS. When I want them to feel real fear I, of course, just whisper...

6 comments:

Expat mum said...

My teenagers still give up when I start counting... Tee hee.

Potty Mummy said...

I'm with TW - I would love not to have to shout but they just take no notice the first 5 times I ask them in a reasonable tone of voice. It's only the 6th time, when I lose it (at least, appear to lose it) that they finally hear...

angelsandurchinsblog said...

A friend asked me if my boys had recently eaten sugar because she was amazed they couldn't walk down a pavement without climbing on to every wall of a suitable (and unsuitable...) height, jumping into puddles and generally going sideways and backwards instead of forwards. Alas, boys don't really need sugar to be on the go all day, as your post so admirably proves. Good luck!

Tattie Weasle said...

Expat Mum - I do do the five, four, three, two, one thing...several times!
Potty - Oh THANK GOD it's not just me then!!!!
angelsandurchins - no they don't need sugar in fact I suspect they require very little before they are set off so to speak - the trouble I've had after they drank a can of coke! I so get what they mena by dancing on the ceiling!!!

janerowena said...

My daughter was so organised that my son came as a real shock. I have found lately that when I thought he was upstairs getting washed and dressed and sorting out his washing - we have breakfast first thing - he was actually sneaking back into bed for another doze/read/listen to music!

Tattie Weasle said...

Janerownea - they are a differnet species nay alien altogether!!!

Go on you know you want to...

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