Shall I just give up on Christmas? I mean it’s not as if we are spending it at home so why bother with decorating it? No one will see it and I don’t think my family will appreciate it either. I posed that question (somewhat aggressively I might add) to the boys this morning. My head was full of the things I had to do IF I decided to go ahead with Christmas at our place.
First, there’d be the Christmas letter to write, the Christmas cards to buy, the envelopes to address and then of course the cost of the stamps. We don’t do much by halves at this place so the Christmas card list sits at nearly 200 strong. We never get back as many cards as we send out I might add.
Then I would have to find tall the decorations and dress the house. It is something I have always loved in the past but with us not being here I wonder would it be worth it and I feel that there is no point. Yet I am conflicted, I do love seeing my home dressed for Christmas.
But there is so much work involved. There is SO much to do. I have work and deadlines to meet and every weekend from now till New Year is packed; no rest or breather though I will admit at least this year I don’t have to do the lot myself. A silly practice I had got into whereby I’d be charging about entertaining from the week before Christmas to the weekend after New Year. No wonder I flopped into a depression every January I was far too exhausted.
So now without that pressure I feel in two minds. Do I hurtle about or do I drop it? There is no particular need is there?
Then I see their faces in the rear-view mirror.
Christmas may not be in our house this year but the build-up still is. I hear a little voice from the back of the car: “So Father Christmas won’t be coming to our house then?”
I check myself. God how selfish I am! “Of course he will sweetheart,” I say. And I mean it. The spirit of Christmas fills my heart because I know how much it means to them and after all what is Christmas all about if not them?
And later I will scamper about in the barn hunting down the decorations.
I will charge off to the shops to get the cards and do the Christmas Shopping.
The Christmas round robin letter will be written.
The envelopes addressed.
And I, well, I won’t be doing everything this time, there will be no cooking or extra cleaning, no jollying along of in-laws and making everything perfect for everyone else because I think that is what they want so I think it will be a Merry Christmas after all…