Monday, 15 September 2008

Having a good (clean) laugh...

I suddenly have a boy not a little boy or even an overgrown toddler but a boy. He has put aside babyish things and now spouts forth to all and sundry everything to do with bottoms.
Ah yes you all murmur with varying shades of embarrassment – lavatorial humour. Please when do they grow out of it?
The mere mention of bottoms, farts, pee and poo send him into paroxysms of stifled laughter. Sometimes he’s helpless with giggling too much and has to resort to shaking silently on the ground curled in an almost foetal position.
The best thing to observe is when he’s in a gaggle of his mates. You can see them egging each other on to say the MOST outrageous thing they can muster gaining particular kudos if it is overheard by an adult.
It bursts forth from them and is immediately rather unsuccessfully stifled by a hand. If admonishment is forthcoming it seems to make the situation worse with added spluttering and choking and in the face of that you know you are lost.
You can see the little blighters strut off like bantam cockerels all puff and pride buoyed up with their victory. You shake your head in secret admiration.
So instead of confrontation how’s about out bottoming them?
Please note this is not to be done when the headmaster can over hear you ‘cos in mid flow on the lavatorial front suddenly The Boy went very silent and I well I carried on until realisation dawned that I was not as alone as I thought.
I turned stricken to see our glorious head standing behind me arms folded.
He: Most enlightening!
All I could do was glow head to foot with embarrassment I tried to say something but instead all I could do was start to giggle. I felt that the situation called for a hasty retreat and The Boy and I bundled ourselves into the car tout suite bright red with embarrassment stifling our laughter as best we could.
It was great to be on the winning side!

10 comments:

Iota said...

I LOVE this story!

My daughter had to cover a sheet of paper from preschool with things beginning with F. Her older brother, aged 7, said, (and you can guess this one) "isn't it a pity you can't draw a fart?" He hasn't yet cottoned on to the amusement value in the name of her teacher, Mrs Martin, for which I'm very grateful, but I suspect it's a matter of time.

I don't know what age they grow out of it. Maybe the encounter with the head teacher will have hastened the process on its way.

Iota said...

Did Top Gear ever answer your email? There's a new series starting over here (in the US) tonight. Should I be watching out for your beloved Landy?

Tattie Weasle said...

IOTA - the tale of my beloved Landy - well it won't appear on the Tellie (sob!) I woz robbed - overruled and had to sell her!!!!! But her replacement - now that IS a story to tell and perhaps a challenge as well...
HOW long does it take for them to grow out of it????

Frances said...

I often take a crosstown bus, from my beloved west side across Central Park to the east side. Many passengers on this route are school children of various ages going from home to school and back again.

I cannot tell you how many times I and other fellow passengers have been greatly amused by the verbal experiments of young children, mainly boys. Horrified moms, or nannies looking on, these children just toss their daring words off, and giggle, giggle giggle.

I am sure that many of them will in a few decades be very famous pillars of society filling very important posts in government, finance, law, education. Meanwhile, their giggly bus rides are fun for the rest of us.

xo

Pondside said...

Oh Tattie - I well remember that stage! At first I was horrified -
who could have taught my winsome,sweet son to talk with a potty mouth? Well - of course I soon got the picture - and the stage passed, but not before the lovely and expensive Brio train set had been doodled on with all the potty words!

Berthddu Suit said...

I have been waiting SO long to hear about the Landy! How disappointing she won't be on the telly! As for toilet humour I gave all those words common usuage so they are no longer so entertaining. My youngest daughter developed a different tack and flashes her bum instead!!

KittyB said...

Hmmm, still going strong here at nearly-9. But then again, S is still going strong at nearly-39 so who can say that the male fascination with all humour lavatorial ever ends?

Tattie Weasle said...

Frances - you paint such a wonderful picture. The worrying thing is that they WILL be pillars of society in the future and how on earth will I ever take them seriously???
Pondside - it's like there's a rogue programme inside that is until bedtime then well there my baby brown eyed boy is..
Berthddu Suit - I was out bottomed AGAIN this afternoon I was very good I kept my mouth shut but I fear they knew...
KittyB - I think I overlooked that fact when I fell in love with Dear Charlie...ah me at least it's only bottoms they are going on about!!!

Cait O'Connor said...

Yes schoolboys humour, I remember it well and practical jokes too - my son had one of those cushions you sit one which makes a rude noise! He had endless enjoyment with that one!

Grouse said...

Darling, when you live with farmers there is simply no end to it........

Go on you know you want to...

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