Humility and humiliation...I just love boys!

So we've opted for 50 Shades of Grey in Book Club and I thought I was going to have to order it via the Library and risk being spotted up to no good by the eternal busybodies that make up country life when a friend up and volunteered her copy.
"For God's sake take it, " she said. "I've got to get it out of the house before my husband sees what it really is all about. He says he's never seen me so engrossed and I just couldn't cope if he knew. It was bad enough when he caught me reading Twilight!"
I know that feeling. There are some things you just don't want your other half knowing about you. Sod stretch marks and VPL and the fact that you only shave to your knees if they knew what you read...well that's getting just too personal. I don't care that I have been married to him for nigh on 13 years I don't like any censure when I read. I don't like people....
Knowing.
When I lived in London I couldn't read on the Tube not because most of the time I found myself squashed up against a stranger's nether regions or else stuffed under their arm pit, it was because I didn't want them to know too much about me or to judge me in any way.
So when I was offered the loan of the book I grabbed at the chance. I knew the book would be delivered to me discreetly and no one would be any the wiser.
BUT
I hadn't reckoned on my youngest or his newly found reading skills...
My lovely friend had popped the infamous book in Bog Boy's book bag for me to collect at the end of the day. I was waving to him merrily as he came out of class when I noticed him delve into the bag.
Everything went into slow motion.
I knew what he was about to do right there in the middle of the school yard where everyone could see.
"Mum," he yelled, his pure young voice ringing out securing everyone's attention as can only happen when you desperately want to hide. "What's this in my book bag?"
He took the tome out and started to wave it about for all to see.
I struggled to get to him through the hordes of children impeding my way.
"Just a book Darling for Mummy pop it back in your book bag..."
"It's called 50 Shades of Grey," he hollered, "What's it about...?"
Ah yes indeed...I cast a furtive and slightly panicky look round. It's funny how you can see immediately those in the know and can read exactly what they think from their faces.
There were a few too many knowing smirks as I hastily grabbed the book, face aflame and stuffed it into my hand bag.
Bang goes any pretence at subtlety and bang goes my previously spotless reputation...so looking forward to tomorrow morning's drop off!

 

Don't judge a book by it's cover....

Sometimes it seems that it is just Sex Sex Sex I can’t seem to get away from it.

Not even at Book Club that solid staple of the really not wanting to be middle aged Middle England housewives.

But it has wormed its way in there in the form of “50 Shadesof Grey”. Now I have not read the book but already it has that giddy teenage reputation among the ladies of the Suffolk branch of the Dead Tree Society that was once held  so dear by the likes of Shirley Conran and Judith Kranz with Lace and Princess Daisy during the early 1980s.

I blame it on Kindle.

Who knows but ourselves what we are reading and oh how demure we can look with the ubiquitous little machine held primly up to our noses.

Now no one can peer imperiously over their glasses an raise an eyebrow at our choice of reading matter for there are no covers to give away our secrets though possibly an enigmatic smile will say more powerfully what has captured our imaginations in far more detail than a mere title emblazoned on the spine of a book.

There is an elevated feeling of liberation knowing that no one knows what you are reading and that they can only guess and never judge unless you give them leave by divulging your secrets.

It makes me feel quite giddy but then I come back down to earth with a bump – I don’t actually have a Kindle and will have to hope that the cover of this well hyped book is very discreet or I’ll just have to do what I did as a teenager – and get a bigger book to hide it!