Friday 14 May 2010

Review : Do you think I will ever be out of nappies?


Do you think I will ever be out of nappies? Seven years on and no let up.
I have tried to calculate just how many nappies that is and averaging eight a day for the first two years of each son’s life gives me a staggering 5840 plus a further 12 months for Bog Boy as he was potty trained by 3 at 6 nappies a day and a further 18 months for The Boy who didn’t potty train until he was three and half gives me another 5475 nappies then of course I have to add on the nights when both boys use pull ups.
Now Bog Boy was actually potty trained through the night as well but we’ll say he needed 1 pull up per night for 6 months and since then, for form’s sake and because his big brother continues to use them, 2 per week since then. The Boy has used at least 1 a night every night since then and occasionally two. Thus as far as pull ups are concerned 3.5 years for The Boy and 6 months for Bog Boy thus four years worth of nights to a total of 1460 pull ups.
So basically that gives me a grand total of: 12,775 nappies, pull ups and night pants of a variety of shapes, sizes and odd cartoon characters to haunt my dreams.
I dread to think of the cost….
Oh go on then lets hunt down an average cost for curiosity’s sake: 14.8p according to http://www.whatprice.co.uk/health/parent/nappies.html so based on that I have spent a total so far of £1890.70 a little bit over the UK average at £800 per child but then again mine seem to have taken longer than average to housetrain.
The Boy’s Absense Seizures (Petit Mal) is probably the main reason for his difficulty or as the doctors call it primary nocturnal enuresis which is persistent, involuntary bedwetting during sleep in a child aged five or over.
I just love the names they give these things but hate it when the health practitioners use it as a way to intimidate you. (Plain English bozos if you cannot communicate clearly you are NOT clever it just shows you have chronic inferiority issues and really should not be allowed to meet the public face-to-face. I would suggest getting a new job in a laboratory or else join the Antarctic Survey!)
Anyway, back to the problem at hand. The Boy and bedwetting or really the fact that the Boy desperately wants to have a sleep over either here or elsewhere. We haven’t quite managed it so far and naturally he realizes that at 7, he really shouldn’t be having to have pull ups. I can dress it anyway I like he knows and so do I that in normal circumstances this would not be happening. But we don’t live in normal circumstances and The Boy has to come to terms with the fact that he has epilepsy. It’s not really impinged too much up till now but with the change of school this term and, well, being much more grown up the ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’ of society are starting to hit the mark. Where once my boy had not the slightest bit of interest in Football now he even knows who the players are, where my boy would be happy to let me choose his clothes now there is a full wardrobe display before he is certain he can venture forth (Thank the powers that be for a strict School uniform policy!).
We’ve tried numerous gadgets and fixes and basically the hassle and anguish they engender is just not worth it. So it’s nappies specifically designed for boys who wet their beds. Ones that look cool or else don’t make that awful  nappy noise like soneon is screwing up paper every time you take a step. Nappies that don’t look like nappies – though to be honest all of them do…
It’s a toss up now between Huggies Dry Nites and Pampers Underjams. On a practical front they both do the job adequately and as far as I am concerned that’s really all I can ask for. At present Underjams are leading the way as The Boy says they aren’t as noisy and feel nice but there again it might also be because they are new. They certainly don't peep over his PJs  so he could get away with it as long as no one saw him getting ready for bed but then again there is always the problem of what to do with a wet nappy in the morning!
I heard recently that Dear Charlie's brother was wetting his bed until 9 years old - only two more years then!

10 comments:

Jude said...

We have the same problem with my almost 6 year old - still in night-time nappies, and I think will be for the forseeable future. He's just such a very sound sleeper, nothing wakes him up, and then he's scared of the dark....and lets face it, pretty lazy too. We use the Huggies - haven't come across the Pampers version. My 3 year old by contrast was dry both at night and in the day as soon as he turned 3. No hassle at all.

Expat mum said...

Bless! You'd actually be surprised at how many older boys wet the bed. Apparently it's a hormone which develops over time. 9 is often around the mark when it kicks in, so yes, about two more years then. Thank god they have nappies though. One of my siblings did this growing up and my mother had to change soaking wet sheets every morning. The pads and rubbers etc. were useless in helping the wet situation.

Lou Archer said...

It's Friday and it may be my glass of wine talking, (how clever) but here at Chez 'bloody freezing' Larches in the middle of winter, I'd have LOVED to have been wearing a nappy....
...sorry, had to share....

Aren't you good at maths?!

March 17th said...

I agree with Expat Mum - my sister wet the bed and my Mother was forever up in the night changing all the bedcovers - she even had this gruesome alarm thing fitted to try and prevent the bedwetting and get her to the loo in time! One fine day for no apparent reason around 8 she just stopped. The sleepover thing is all the rage I used to have friends to stay but I'm sure we were a little older. As you say that's a lot of nappies...xxx

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

He's only 7 , he'll stop in his own good time .Meanwhile he , and the rest of his class , are still a bit young for sleepovers , which is good , because it gives him time to settle into his new group and feel at home .
And secretly , be pleased that the sleepover thing is still in the future ..... ghastly . THAT'S parental sleep deprivation !

Exmoorjane said...

Have a toddler staying with us right now (aaaghhh!!!!) and it's bringing back the hell of nappies.

Hey, did you give in and get the cake?? xxxx

Mother Hen said...

It's been ages since nappies but I did used to put little girl knickers on our dog when she was in season. She liked the purple ones the best and always pulled off flowered ones. It saved a fortune on having the carpets cleaned.
I have checked out the writing course over at Tim Atkinsons blog. Thanks!

A Mum said...

oh such a long time ago: nappies. it is a far away blur of buckets (we did terries; pampers for high days and holidays only as too expensive where i live). babies in terries always looked like fat drunks when they start to walk: disposables give them a much more streamlined shape and must aid in their uprightness? when they got the teeniest bit wet their bottoms would drag behind them down to their knees. Which just proved what a bad mother you were!

Anonymous said...

That's a lot of dosh spent on nappies!! Probably why Terry's were the best bet!

CJ xx

veryanniemary said...

My eldest wet the bed until she was 9...personally I wouldn't bother with the gadgets - it can make the child think they need 'fixing' and they don't. Put a pad under his sheet to protect the mattress or be prepared to change his mattress in 2 years and just have a lot of laundry! My girl went on sleepovers to places that I knew I could trust the mom with the truth...she wore pullups and in the morning, the mom helped her get rid of the evidence without anyone else knowing - or she would wriggle out of the pullup and leave it in the sleeping bag - which meant I had to wash the sleeping bag when she got home - but honestly in the great scheme of things who cares about a little more laundry?

Go on you know you want to...

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