- Do not go into town to do your shopping on the second to last Saturday before Christmas - it's not clever and it's not funny and you''ll land up waiting in queues for ages in HMV and then the bundle you want will be sold out and on top of that they will not be able to second guess you when you say you are looking for the latest hit by the Allie girl. After what feels like two hours making them search everywhere for you you will realise it's not Allie but Lily Allen. You are then given a withering look and they promptly say that they don't have her most recent Album anyway...
- Do not leave writing your Christmas cards adn Christmas letter to the last minute as it will cause undue pressure on your marraige cause your children to cry and force your dogs to seek sanctuary under the table. You will go to bed feeling very cross and have a rotten night's sleep...
- Do not agree to host a drinks part for all and sundry between Christmas and New Year because you have been lax on the socialising front. You know everyone will say yes just because you dont want them to and instead of the 20 you thought you were catering for you'll land up with 80 plus hangers on!
- Do not take the sports car with you to do the Christmas shopping you will only get stopped by police on way home and have to explain that the reason that you cannot vacate you car is because if you open the door all your necessities will spill all over the road causing a hazard to other motorists...
- Do not say it's Ok for your sister/parents/in-laws to stay over the Christmas /New Year season and bring their dogs when you already have seven to look after yourself...you just know that on Christmas morning you are the one who will tread on the proverbial before you have even had the chance for a nice cup of tea...
PS: ThinkingSlimmer - ohmygod I've lost 2lbs!!!!!!!! It has been quite amazing I haven't stopped eating or changed what it is I do eat, I have just been so much more aware and boy has it made a difference...
