|This is What I Think of Greens!|
It is a truth universally acknowleged, that a small boy in possession of a dish of greens, must be in want of a way to get rid of it. And if that way is to throw–up then throw-up one must.
Problem is this does not endear you to your parents - in particular your Mum, who lives in fear that you will never grow because you don’t always eat your one a day let alone your five.
Thus was I faced with a rebellious small boy on Sunday evening flatly refusing to eat his salad.
“It makes me sick!”
“Horrocks! Greens never made anyone sick!”
“They will you know! They’ll make ME sick!”
Shades of Violet Elizabeth Bott, I thought murderously. We have been battling for months with Bog Boy to get him to eat fruit and veg, especially the green stuff, and after a long half term, and an equally long Sunday, this latest mutiny was one too far and I flipped:
“If you throw up I will make you eat it all back up!”
I didn’t think he was going to be sick, honestly I didn’t! I just wanted him to stop being a pain in the neck and just get on and eat his supper including his greens. I was tired and I wanted both my boys in bed so I could finally relax safe in the knowledge that tomorrow it would be someone else’s problem.
I gave him a gimlet-eyed stare and stomped off in to the TV room before I said anything further. Sometimes it is safest to leave them to it.
There was very little sound from the kitchen and all seemed to be going well but then there was the most almighty wail. The kind of wail that has any parent up in a flash. The wail when you know your child is not mucking about and that this is an emergency.
The sight before my eyes was not pretty but it was the terrible moans escaping from Bog Boy that wracked me most:
“Oh NOooooooo” he sobbed almost incoherently, “I’m going to have to eat it all up!”
Of course I didn’t make him do anything of the sort but I was still angry. Little toad had drunk so much water he’s effectively made himself sick.
Fast forward to Monday and off they trundled to school with Bog Boy still behaving in a ridiculous manner saying he was going to be sick if he ate breakfast.
He was still complaining at suppertime but everything had gone well at school so he had to be alright surely.
Supper was lovely Spaghetti Bolognese with a rich homemade tomato sauce. I promise he did not eat that much but at 10 o clock just as I was going to let the dogs out and trundle off to bed I heard a creaking on the stairs and was met by a wan little face with the most enormous eyes.
“I really have been sick this time Mummy and I didn’t make myself!”
Oh boy had he been sick several times along the corridor, the bathroom and oh dear god all over his bed the floor and everywhere – even bless him on his teddies Jelly and Puppy! There was not a hope in heck that he had made himself do this!
I felt SO very guilty! My poor little mite had been telling me he wasn’t well and I bad mother had totally ignored him!!!
PS. My Poor little mite is not going into school until Thursday and in the meantime he is sitting next to me playing on my ipad. The best cure for being sick he says….