Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Salutatory lessons in blogging (or how to wreck your family life with the click of a button)


I’ve not posted recently because I am in deep trouble. I don’t think I meant to do it deliberately but I posted when I wasn’t thinking. That post has caused a lot of heartache even though those that read it probably thought it was pretty harmless - but there again those that read it were not members of my immediate family.

I have read about tiffs with friends and family and even bosses and work colleagues but never thought it would happen to me. I thought I was good at this game by keeping names out, not posting pictures and keeping my blogging antics - well private. But privacy on the Internet is basically an oxymoron and you can never be too vigilant.

  • Lesson 1: Blogging is NOT like writing in a secret code in a diary that you keep under lock and key in the safe. It is out there and sooner or later someone you know and care about is bound to read it.
  • Lesson 2: Publish and be damned. Always re-read your posts before you hit publish and ask yourself: “Will anyone be hurt or offended by this if they read it?” And more importantly if you do and they do will the resulting flak be worth it?
  • Lesson 3: The truth will out. Always be truthful when you blog especially if you mention your family, friends or boss. That witty one liner never said at the time but you wish it were…well just because you wrote that it did doesn’t mean that it happened in real life and it is extremely embarrassing if you get caught out.

I think with those three lessons now firmly embedded I should keep myself out of trouble but even that aint necessarily so. Only the other week I had to edit a post even though I was praising the company in question to the skies for a brilliant piece of customer care.

  • Lesson 4: You can’t please some people.

16 comments:

Pam said...

Oh Tatttie, what can I say. I have comforted myself in reading back through previous fabulous posts thinking that you have a wonderful way with words.Long may it continue with your perceptive and humorous ways.The biggest of hugs, because I think you could do with one!

Pondside said...

Hug from here too, Tattie. Whoever is reading and was upset should surely be appeased by your post - it has all the necessary ingredients of a serious mea culpa. I'm glad you weren't completely put off blogging!

Preseli Mags said...

I know this too well! I shall try and follow your rules in future too. I hope everything is okay for you soon.

My sister and I are still not on speaking terms a year on from my offending blogs. Recently she read them again and got offended all over again, but this time by the comments! I had, however, stuck firmly to your Rule Number Three and was truthful, but perhaps a little too much!

As for not keeping out of trouble in the future... I think I'd have to stop blogging!

PS: I love your blogs and I'm glad you weren't completely put off.
PPS: Wasn't it the Daily Express which had the motto: Never let the truth get in the way of a good story? I think that should be Rule Number Five!
PPS: I'm going to add a disclaimer to my blog about it being my opinion etc. Off to think how to word it...>>>

Melitsa said...

It is so hard. Thanks for the reminder.

Mud in the City said...

So sorry Tattie - and it is a scary and timely reminder that the internet isn't a vaccuum.
Your writing is wonderful, insightful and enlightening. Please don't let this stop you!

elizabethm said...

Glad you are still here and still blogging! We should all have your rules tattooed on our arms so we can remind ourselves!

Tattie Weasle said...

Pam - Oh thank you for the hug it was sorely needed and for your wonderful words they mean an awful lot!
Pondside - Much mea culpa and as long as I don't do it again I think I might be forgiven - in time...
Preseli Mags - me too working on the "opinions expressed in this blog are not always those of the author..." or something like it!
As for sisters - well they're sisters (I was going to say more but I don't want to get into trouble again so quickly!!!!)
Melitsa - Anytime! I only wish I had read some rules before I posted. Perhaps this will save someone else from making the same mistake.
Mud - what can I say thnak you very much and well as you can see I aint stopping yet but I will be more careful in future!
Elizabethm - I think I will have to chant them every morning and then have them as my screen saver - but I have a feeling that I will probably slip up again sometime in the future but I may get lucky and no one will notice...

Iota said...

Oh yes. Oh YES.

I caused great offence recently to a friend who didn't know I had a blog. Because of two chance conversations (a friend told a friend told a friend), she started reading it, found herself depicted in a post, and was very upset.

I've been blogging for over 2 years, and have written over 170 posts. She found out about the blog within a fortnight of me referring to her, so the post was right up there in the first 4 or 5. It wasn't even a whole post, just one sentence. Literally. And an anonymous reference at that. It's extraordinary that she spotted it.

The thing that annoys me about this story (sorry to go on about it) is that I had thought about it carefully in advance, and knew it was a calculated risk, but thought the risk so small that it was worth taking. It's not as if I just didn't consider.

So yes, you just can't be too careful.

Faith said...

Maybe its worse if friends/family secretly read one's blog and are offended but say nothing. Having been 'read' by a member of my extended family (another forum, almost another life!) I am now more careful about what I write about.

Tattie Weasle said...

Iota - No worries about it go on as much as you like! I am so sorry that it happened but if it's small comfort it seems to happen to an awful lot of us! Hope it will blow over soon...
Faith - as you say never can be too careful. Now you have me really worried about it...;)

Ladybird World Mother said...

There is always that tiny smidgeon of fear that what you write might offend. I've just written a post and lost a follower! WHY??!! Oh, well. You keep writing... whatever you write about is well worth it. xxx

Pipany said...

Thanks for the reminder tattie. It is so hard because blogging does have the air of a diary hidden away, but also because it is the written word which has no facial expressions or body language to help decipher meaning. Glad you are back though Tattie xx

Tattie Weasle said...

Ladybird World Mother - you've lost a follower? Ouch! Maybe they just didn't appreciate you. I am very sorry, I'll have to rectify that...:)
Pipany - I'm glad I'm back too. I was in floods at teh thought of not being able to blog which actually sounds a bit silly but getting good feedback/comments can really make my day!

Expat mum said...

Well you've reinforced my conviction that it's not worth the risk. I mention the kids but only if it's funny, and they all have nick names. I just can't be bothered with the whining that would ensue if I went into too much detail. I'm also careful when I talk about anyone else as I'm not really anonymous. No wonder I have to whitter on about minutiae!

KittyB said...

I hate that we have to censor ourselves in our outpourings, but we do. Some of the best and funniest things that happen to me can't make it into my blog beacuse the telling would offend someone or other who would no doubt find themselves, even under a pseudonym. It makes for a rather tamer version of life being put down for the record. Ho hum.

Tattie Weasle said...

Expat Mum - Your whittering is fabulous!
KittyB - I have come up with a cunning wheeze I still write it all down warts and all but for my own consumption and for posterity of course but I keep it away from the blog so there can be no publishing by mistake!

Go on you know you want to...

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin