Tuesday, 16 December 2008

Wishful thinking

Knock. Knock. Knock.
From the warmest depths of my duvet I hear it.
Knock. Knock. Knock. “Let me out!”
A plaintive cry from the youngest, enough to tug at any normal mother’s heartstrings but, I am afraid, not mine. It has yet to strike six in the morning and I am in no mood to get up. It is cold out there. I can tell this as I can see the streams of breath rise to the ceiling of my bedroom. And I do not want to get up.
Mummeee! Daaaadeee! Let me out!”
Perhaps if I ignore him he’ll give up and start playing with his Duplo – after all that is the whole reason why I allowed him to have a huge box of it in the first place. I try to sleep again.
“Let! Me! Out!”
OK! So that plan isn’t working. Better get up and sort him out. Some of you may be wondering exactly where my youngest is, I promise you he’s in his bedroom and a very nice room it is too, unlike mine his has curtains. The only problem, as far as he’s concerned, is that the latch is too high for him to reach – for other parents out there you, like me, will see this as a positive bonus. Let’s face it how many times in your life have you been disturbed in flagrante delicto in your bedrooms/bathrooms/or even on kitchen tables? I rest my case – although will add that the positioning of The Littlest’s bedroom door latch was not a deliberate act it was merely one of fortunate joinery.
As I reach the top of the stairs to descend and release the tyrant before he causes structural damage to the fabric of the house, I hear The Boy’s door open and am in time to catch a glimpse of him as he dashes to his brother’s aid with the immortal words: “Don’t worry, I’ll rescue you!”
The Boy is as heavily into heroics and being a hero. Occasionally, of course, he gets a little carried away and I am attacked on the stairs, in the bathroom or even as I get into bed, by boy brandishing a squidgy and much battered sword with the cries: “Hold Hard!” “Stop!” and of course “Die!”
I believe it is in a mother's best interest to die as often as possible. So now I tip[ toe back to bed to play dead perhaps they'll go away and leave me alone to sleep...or perhaps that's just wishful thinking!


menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

What a brilliant take on family life you have Tats. Great story and yes if fortune meant you to have a high latch on his door then who are you to interfere with what is meant to be?!

mountainear said...

How very true! We found difficult door handles and older brothers could be very useful too.

Hope you enjoyed your lie in - or should that perhaps be 'die-in'.

Calico Kate said...

Lovely blogs Tattie Weasel. I have just been reading them all!
Loved the dog poem and send love for his loss. I don't hve children but they seem to be very resiliant to these things, well yours do anyway!
Good luck with your marathon training.

Sally's Chateau said...

Amused smile here. xx

Frances said...

Good lads, your boys!
I just love the way that you have described this early morning rescue.


Pondside said...

I hope you were able to squeeze another cozy half hour in bed thanks to your heroic son!
Where would we be without wishful thinking, dreaming, fantasy?
Errr - Tattie....Kitchen table????

Elizabethd said...

It's a long time ago, but how I remember those few moments longing to stay in a warm bed...without child.
I do hope no one from Childline is reading you at the moment!!

elizabethm said...

Oh yes, my son used to wield his wooden sword too. I love "Hold hard!" I think I will add it to my repertoire of attention getting cries when Ian is deep in an Ebay transaction.
Hope you had an extra half hour or so of deep warm sleep.

Iota said...

My absolute favorite game with small children is 'dead lions'. Do you know that one? It works best if you join in and are a lion too.

david mcmahon said...

The ``dead fish'' game works well - sometimes!!

Keep me posted about what time you get woken up on the 25th morning!

Pipany said...

Sounds good to me Tattie. I find any and every reason to sneak back to bed! xx

Anonymous said...

Lovely post. I shall be back to read more when there is more time. Wish I had thought of the high latch dodge, it wuld have been deliberate on my part.

Sandi McBride said...

Ah yes...wishful thinking indeed...and next thing you know you'll have hours and hours to sleep in...enjoy those young tyrants whilst you may! They'll be able to get out any door they want soon enough...
Congrats on the Post of the Day mention from David's...I loved this.

Tattie Weasle said...

MOB - I do love a good joiner you could say he was heaven sent!
Mountaineer - died several times this evening and have been promised major lie in tomorrow...
CK - thank you it means a lot when people drop by. As for marathon training more of that to come!
Sally - long may amusement last...I think I may start to get like Queen Victoria with the Boys.
Frances - The Boy is a hero in so many ways.
Pondside - it's a big kitchen table er that was the question wasn't it???
Elizabethd - childline? what about mumline???!!! That sword hurts you know.
Elizabethm - I think it came for Pirates of the Caribean there are some pretty good moves you could use from there as well...
Iota - don't do dead lions but do do sleeping crodile...
David - Not sure about dead fish sounds like water and anything with water for my boys gets very messy indeed! I'll keep you posted half dreading half looking forward to it!
Pipany - you and me both!
Moannie - I don't think I would have been that clever nor as forward thinking!
Sandi - will keep on enjoying them for they continually surprise me and secretly I love it but don't say anything too loudly. I'm meant to be scary...as for being mentioned on Post of teh Day , I had no idea. Feel very flattered and humbled.

Go on you know you want to...


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