Chief Weeder's Lament

Hello again!! I made it better late than never - It is so wonderful to see you all and very exciting! Huge cheers to all who worked so hard to do this for us - in total awe! Thought I would share this with you as while all the excitement was going on I was incommunicado and I worked so hard on this while the computer was down - I'm d***ned if I am not going to share it ... I did put it up on the other side but I wasn't looking...
PS About to open Champagne - drop by for a glass, the sun is shining and there's always an excuse to celebrate!

The Chief Weeder's Lament
(With abject apologies to Lewis Carrol….)

I was a walking with Dear Charlie
And we were both agreed;
We wept like anything to see
Such quantities of weed:
"If this were only cleared away,
"The garden could be freed!"

"If seven boys with seven forks
Dug it for half a year.
Do you suppose," Dear Charlie said,
"That they could get it clear?"
"I doubt it," said his darling wife,
And shed a bitter tear.

"There’s bindweed and ground elder here!"
Knotweed, nettles, couch grass,
Broadleaved plantain, ribwort plantain,
We’ll have to let it pass:
We cannot afford to do it all,
It’ll cost far too much brass."

The Darling wife and Dear Charlie
Walked on a foot or so,
And then they rested on a log
Conveniently low:
And all the little weedies stood
And waited for the blow.

"The time has come," Dear Charlie said,
"To talk of many things:
Of slugs--and snails--and flower shows--
Of cabbages--and spring--
And why the weeds keep on growing--
And whether rooks should sing."

"But wait a bit," the wife did cry,
"Before we have our chat;
An idea has just sprung to mind,
To get us out of that!"
"Concrete it over then?” he said.
She thanked him much for that.

"A nature garden," his wife said,
"Is what we chiefly need:
Encouraging the bugs and things
It’s very good indeed--
Now if you're ready, Charlie dear,
We can begin to weed."

"But not on these!" Dear Charlie cried,
Turning a little blue.
"Not after such a good idea, ”
It really would not do!"
"The day is fine," his Wife did say.
"Do you admire the view?

"It was kind of you to agree!
And you are very nice!"
Dear Charlie now said nothing but
"This won’t cut any ice:
I do not wish to weed at all--
I've had to tell you twice!"

"It seems a shame," Dear Charlie said,
"To play me such a trick,
After such a very good idea,
And the weeds are so thick!"
The Darling wife said nothing but
"Try not to weed so quick!"

"I weep for you," Dear Charlie said:
"I deeply sympathize."
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.

"O Charlie," said the darling wife,
"We have had such a lot of fun!
We’ve nearly done all the weeding now'
But answer came there none--
And this was scarcely odd, because
Charlie’d done a fast one.